I can't truly say that I have ever traveled anywhere completely solo, but I have been to three different countries this year and done plenty of site-seeing all on my own. That said there are some things that I have mastered and others that I have not. There are two things I have yet to do. One of them is sit in a restaurant and eat alone (if I'm eating alone it's always a date with the TV in my hotel room), and the second is go to a bar by myself. Ok so without having done those things I can not give a true opinion about what it is like to go completely solo, but I can tell you what my experiences has made me realize.
Today I got up showered and just went on my happy way. No one to answer to or wait for to get ready that in itself is a beautiful thing. Out the door I went on my journey to Malahide castle. The walk through the castle grounds and the castle itself was incredible. I took my time wandering through the grounds pausing for a brief moment to contemplate taking off my socks and tennis shoes, so I could run through the lush green grass. Despite the child in me I did refrain, but only because it had rained earlier and it was a bit chilly outside. I then went into the castle for my tour and took my time looking at each thing that suited me. They had an extensive collection of antique furniture and portrait art. There was one other person on this tour that was alone. I wondered later why he went alone because desperately wanted companionship. He was a nice man from who was on holiday from Holland and in the mood to chat. I was cordial but honestly I'm not a real big fan of small talk, so I think I was a bit of a disappointment.
Once I finished my tour I headed to the gift shop where I did the unthinkable...dropped a glass vase that I was looking at. Thankfully it was not very expensive and the lady seemed more concerned about the nuisance of cleaning it up then me paying for it, so I did what anyone would do assume everything was kosher and fled the scene. I then headed to the castle's restaurant where I was served the best cup of hot cocoa I think I've ever had accompanied by the driest blueberry muffin I think I had ever had. It was now time for my brief walk back to the hotel. I took my time stopping at shops on the way and wandered down to the marina-I can seldom resist the water. It was ok that I had failed to lose my shoes earlier because I fully intend to spend some time on the sand without them. I find nothing more calming to my mind and soul than sitting near the water and listening to waves. Anyway it was a great morning I never felt lonely and was happy to have the time all to myself.
I had a similar experience a few weeks ago when I spent the day tooling around Vancouver. I went to the Art Gallery there and saw the work of Auguste Rodin and Emily Carr (there were others as well just that Rodin and Carr were my favorites). I think I spent about three hours wandering through the exhibits taking my time at each piece of art work. I enjoyed the independence of not being concerned with inconveniencing someone else. I didn't have to consider if they were bored or tired or if their feet hurt as much as mine did. However, I can say that there is something a bit depressing looking at a miniature bronze caste of The Kiss sculpture by Rodin without someone holding my hand then noticing that it seems as though I'm the only one alone. It is this feeling that keeps me from walking into a pub or restaurant by myself. As long as I am not faced with my solidarity I enjoy it.
So will I ever travel completely solo? I doubt it I think that despite my introverted tendencies it seems that I would be happiest traveling with someone who enjoys spending hours at an art gallery without saying a word to the person next to them, but looking for my hand when they see something that makes them want me to be near.
